There are paranormal sightings that make you want
to know more in the hopes that they’re truly real. Then there are
paranormal sightings that make you go “Really?” These three recent,
well-publicized sightings are varying degrees of “Really?” and are
presented to show just how hard it’s becoming to prove the existence of
cryptids, aliens and otherworldly things while the mass media has
discovered the attraction of publicizing highly skeptical events in the
name of paranormal reality.
Case One is the alleged Chupacabra sighting in Houston reported by multiple local media outlets.
This one was the typical Texas-style Chupacabra – a mangy-looking
canine-ish creature staggering through the brush on the west side of
this heavily populated and increasingly urbanized city in a manner that
suggests a sick animal looking for comfort or a secluded place to suffer
in peace – not a blood-sucking, vicious cryptid looking for fresh
goats, livestock or pets. (See the picture and coverage here.) This is the same city where a starving pet tiger
was found recently in a home living in a filthy cage. So it’s not
inconceivable this “Chupacabra” was a mistreated pet. Houston is also
the home of numerous recent chemical spills and explosions, so it’s also
possible this was a coyote or loose dog suffering from toxic exposure …
a possible cause of the Texas version of what Puerto Ricans see as more
of a two-legged reptilian creature. Sorry, Houston … the needle is
buried in the Highly Skeptical area on our meter.
Better-fed dogs and no chemical spills = less Chupacabras?
“Is that Jesus Christ? Please, oh, Father God.”
Case Two is the alleged “flying humanoid” reported and recorded over
Burbank, California, by Pablo Morales, whose inclusion of religious
exclamations in the audio surely attracted even more attention to this
typical “flying humanoid” sighting on what appeared to be a stormy day –
always good for adding to the mood. (Watch the video here.)
As usual, the most common of the logical comments on the video was an
escaped string of balloons (aren’t we supposed to be suffering from a
helium shortage?). With so many Marvel movies out, it seems various
fictional superhero characters came in second, while angels of some sort
benefited from Pablo’s religious exclamation and finished third. On
this dark and stormy nightmare of a balloonish floating ‘something’, the
meter is pointing to Very Skeptical.
Finally, we have Case Three – an animal mutilation report from
Cornwall that in the U.S. might be blamed on aliens but in England it’s
instead linked to witches and pagans. Cornwall Live
interviewed Brian Lemin, an animal control official who was contacted
by a farmer in the Middle Taphouse area of Dobwalls and arrived there to
find two lambs which had their heads cut cleanly from their bodies –
heads which were nowhere to be found. (Gross pictures here.)
Lemin ruled out any sort of local predator like a fox or dog because
the bodies showed no gnaw marks and still had all of their organs. He
could have also ruled out Chupacabras or other cryptids because the
bodies were still full of blood. Aliens? Cornwall Live says locals would
rather blame witches or people who have different religious beliefs
that they do – i.e. “pagans.” Richard Blackett, a media officer for the
Pagan Federation (pagans have a media department?), responded quickly
and angrily.
“This has no part in any practice by Pagan groups. I
would say it smacks of antisocial behaviour, cruelty to animals. What
has been done to these lambs is gruesome and unpleasant and it is not
something those in the Pagan community would ever condone.”
Amen … or whatever Wicca, witchcraft, Druidism and other “land-based
religions” say to agree. This actually sounds more like what Jennifer
Hobson told Cornwall Live:
“It’s probably nasty little a***holes. Or older nasty a***holes who want to sell the skulls on eBay.”
Nasty a***holes. (Why three asterisks? It’s ‘arse’ in England.) For
some reason, that seems to increasingly be the real cause behind many of
these alleged paranormal events. While the clean cuts and missing heads
in this case warrant further investigation, the needle on this one is
still firmly on the skeptical side of the meter.
All together now … Really?
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